So, the last time I posted here was before Jeff left for Honduras. Since then I've managed to make it to Ping four times: once the day before he left, and three times while he was gone (including today).

No really stellar runs, except today's. I ran a full 30 minutes again! And I wasn't planning on it at all. I thought I'd just try to do a quick 15-20 minute run. But I felt great at 20 minutes, so I did another song. And then another. And then one more lap.

My other runs were all around 20 minutes. Good for maintenance, which is what I'm shooting for now.

Post-Thanksgiving

Last Wednesday I tried to run with Kristen as a sort of preemptive strike against turkey and stuffing. I was feeling tired and run-down, and I could tell as I ran. I didn't even make it through half of the 30 minute run. Ugh.

Today I got back out there, and it went well. I managed 25 minutes straight, which felt pretty good. And I felt great too when I stepped on the scale and saw that the gallons of turkey, stuffing, sweet potatoes, green bean casserole, pumpkin pie, and homemade gravy didn't do too much damage: 133.6. I was expecting a much higher number, to be honest. Whew.

Jeff leaves tomorrow for Honduras (gulp), so I have to arrange babysitters to swing by so I can get a few runs in. I hope I can make that happen.

I did it!

Today was my "final" run of the couch-to-5k training. I ran for 30 minutes without a break. I actually ran for 30 1/2 minutes to complete a lap.

This may actually have only come in to just short of a 5k. One or two more laps may have done it. I'll work up to counting the actual laps next week.

How do I feel about accomplishing this goal? Strangely, both really good and slightly anticlimactic. No streamers unfurled or balloons dropped from the ceiling of Ping when I finished that last lap. I just walked a few more to cool down, and then stretched like always. But I reached a goal that I set for myself way back in August, a milestone I honestly didn't think I'd reach.

Now I need to set some new goals.

Today's weight: 134 even.

Today's run of 26 minutes went well, aided by: my new running shorts and shirt (birthday gift from Kristen), my new running shoes (paid for by the proceeds of birthday gifts from Grandma and the Tigs), and my new iPod (birthday gift from my parents). As I was stretching out before the run I realized how true the adage "the clothes make the man" really is. I felt like a real runner.

I'll run Wednesday and Friday this week, and on Friday I should do my first actual 5k length-run. Wow!

Well, not only did I make it for my entire run time Thursday, but that rascal Kristen tricked me and got me to run another two minutes. So I ran for 26 minutes! That's only four minutes short of 5k. Wow!

And I am now the proud owner of an ipod shuffle, thanks to my parents, which will be a big running incentive, too.

Nine weeks

Today is my 30th birthday. When I started this exercise/diet plan nine weeks ago, my goal was to be running a 5k by my birthday. I also wanted to have dropped some of that extra baby weight.

I'm almost there. I can run more than two miles without stopping. I'm adding a little bit of time every running day, so that I hope to be comfortably running a 5k by Thanksgiving. And although I didn't make my original goal, I still feel really good about what I have accomplished.

And my weight is down. I'm below 135. My measurements are within an inch of where I was pre-pregnancy. I can wear a lot of my old clothes, although some pants are still a bit snug. I would like to drop a few more pounds, but I would be happy just to maintain.

I'm going to try to run for 24 minutes this afternoon. I might not have time to post afterward, as the CRAZY BIRTHDAY FESTIVITIES will ensue. But I'll try to pop in.

I skipped my weekend run. I know, I know. But I'm so busy! And it was cold!

Anyway. I did get back to the gym today, and broke a bit of a personal barrier...I ran with someone. I have a thing about not wanting to run with anyone. I find running embarrassing. I get red-faced but not around my eyes, giving me an attractive raccoon mask. I really have to focus on my breathing and pace to not trip spectacularly over my own feet.

But I've been running for nearly ten weeks now, and am feeling more comfortable with myself as a runner. So when I realized I left my MP3 player at home, it didn't take much for me to accept my friend Kristen's suggestion that we run together.

And it rocked! I paid less attention to how much I hate running and how tired I was getting and am I done yet? Instead we chatted (I conversed less as the run went on and I grew more winded). Kristen has a running watch (something I need) so she kept track of the time. I didn't ask until we had reached 13 minutes.

By the last two laps, I was really feeling it. But I stuck it out and ran for 22 minutes. I felt a little dizzy afterward, probably due to my light lunch. I am still struggling to strike a balance between too much food (barf) and too little (faint) before a run.

Today's weight: 133.6. I was surprised to see this number on the scale, as I haven't been too diligent with the eating lately, and I had been plateaued at 135-136 for a while. Maybe it won't last, but it felt good to see it.

Good run today. I ran for twenty minutes (!) followed by a five-minute walk, then another five minutes of running. And it felt really good! My legs were pretty tired, but my heart felt strong. That feels like a weird thing to say, but it's true.

I've decided to try to add another two minutes to that first long run every running day until I'm running three miles/thirty minutes total, then start to chip away at the need to walk at all. I may not make my goal of a 5k by my birthday (a week from today!) but I'll be close at least.

Weight today was 136.2.

Today's run went well, but only after I came to the realization that I'm drifting away from the Couch-to-5k program. I didn't get in a third run last week at all. And my two runs were nowhere near the "run for 25 minutes" I was supposed to be doing.

I was feeling guilty about that today, about not having the time, ability, initiative, whatever to stick with the program. But then, as I was running, I thought "Hey, at least I'm improving." Today I ran for 18 minutes, then walked for five, and then ran for six more.

And you know what? I think I should feel pretty awesome about that. It shows that I've really come a long way in the past nine weeks. Even in the past three weeks. When I reached the 12-minute mark today, I thought "Two months ago I wouldn't have been able to do this at all." And then I kept running for six more minutes. And it felt pretty good.

My run yesterday went better...much better than Tuesday's run, and better than I anticipated it would go. I still had to walk midway through, but I ran the total time/distance. I ended up running for 14 minutes, walking for five, and running for nine.

I realize that's short of the total running time of 25 minutes, but I am such a speed racer that I am running a mile (10 laps on the track) in about nine and a half minutes, so I am getting the right distance if not the right time.

week 7, plus update

Just quickly since I have approximately a billion papers to grade this evening (okay, twenty)...I've been neglecting updating here lately for a couple of reasons. First, because of the aforementioned papers. I'm stressed out and bogged down with my teaching work plus grad school applications. This stress has also fed the second problem, which is my inability to find time to run. I ran on Sunday night instead of my usual Saturday morning run, and I only had about twenty minutes so I cut my run short. Instead of the twenty-minute run I ran for about fifteen minutes total. And yesterday I just wasn't feeling too great, plus my sports bra (my one decent one) was in the wash, so I skipped the run. I ran today instead and it was the opposite of good. Very, very bad. Instead of one straight 25 minute run, I ran for ten minutes, walked for five, and ran for eight before stopping because I was pretty sure I was about to barf over the edge of the track onto the 18-year-olds on the elliptical trainers. Real, hard-core nausea that I haven't felt since being pregnant. NO I'M NOT PREGNANT, fyi.

So, to recap: poopy. Weight today: 134.4.

Quick note to say that yesterday's run was TOTALLY AWESOME. Seriously. Two ten-minute (or one mile) runs with a three-minute walk between. I felt great. I didn't have to stop or anything. My friend Kristen, who was on a treadmill downstairs, said I looked great, like a real runner. Imagine, me! A REAL RUNNER!

Week six, we meet at last.

I felt different going into today's run. For the first time, I felt confident and assured that I would make it through the run. For one, it was a smaller, staggered run. After two two-mile runs rounding out last week, I knew this one wouldn't give me problems. And I was right! I felt good, but tired, at the end.

Charlotte's tugging at my leg to help her put her sock on her hand (like a puppet), so I should go.

Weight today: 135.2. Holding steady. At least the half pizza I ate Sunday night didn't cause any gain! Pizza....mmmm...hadn't had it in 6 weeks. It tasted fabulous.

Week five (finally) over

I did my last run for the doubled week five yesterday. Because it was such a beautiful day, and since I didn't want to take the extra time to drive onto campus, I ran on the bike path.

It was a very pleasant run, which surprised me. I still didn't make it all the way through the twenty minutes without a walk, but I still only walked for a minute, and I felt really good all the way through.

It'll be nice to start a new week this coming week and feel like I'm making progress toward my 5k-by-my-30th goal.

Two miles!

Break out the champagne! Today I ran two miles! Today I ran two miles (almost) nonstop!

What's that little parenthetical aside, you ask? Whither the "(almost)?"

Well, I didn't quite make it through without a break.

Today's run was twenty minutes. Of running. That's it. Warm up, run for twenty minutes/two miles, cool down. To my credit, I made it to seven minutes before I checked my watch. I made it to fourteen minutes before I had to walk. And I only walked for a minute before I started up again and finished the last six minutes.

I was counting my laps in my head as I went, and I found out that I actually hit two miles at around nineteen minutes. But kept going in case I was wrong and had lost count.

It feels great to have done it. It doesn't feel as great to have to do it again on Saturday.

Real Beauty

Sometimes I worry about having a daughter, a little girl who potentially will have to face all the crap regarding body image and size and weight and beauty standards that I did, but tenfold due to the even greater prevalence of media today. This short from Dove made me cry, because it encapsulates that.

"Onslaught"

"Daughters"

bleargh.

When I run, I obviously take note of how I feel during the run. Do I see especially tired? Am I dragging my feet? Do I have pains in my sides? Do I feel awesome and tireless? Are any particular muscles sorer than usual?

Some runs are hard. Today was one of them. I felt tired. I was really dragging, running much more slowly than usual. I felt like I couldn't really catch my breath well, particularly toward the end of the run.

When I have a day like that, I try to think about what might be the culprit. Not enough water? Not enough to eat? Too much to eat? Not enough sleep?

One thing I've tried to balance is eating and drinking before a run. I used to err on the side of eating lightly, thinking too much food would result in the "Scott Syndrome"*. But I found that I really needed more food, and more fuel. So I try to eat well (healthy stuff, but still enough) on run days. I also try to really start water-loading the night before, but not too much right before running, because I don't particularly want to wet my pants. This is a genuine concern having had a baby. And I don't think they make Depends for runners.

I don't know why today's run was so sucky. It wasn't a new run--it was a repeat of Saturday's. I ate well. I drank enough water. But I felt like crap and could hardly finish the second round of eight minutes.

I did finish, though.

Another issue: my weight today was 135.6. Last week, you might have noticed, I didn't post my weight. That's because I was back up to 137. I felt bad about that...but again, I have no idea why it happened. I think I had a few big, off-the-plan meals. But I was also very active last week. I was sick with a vicious cold...perhaps that's it.

I'm curious and a bit nervous to see how Thursday's run of 20 minutes straight goes.

week five continues

Yesterday I ran the second day of week five, which I will do again on Tuesday. And it went great! The run consisted of the normal five-minute warm-up walk, then eight minutes of running, another five-minute walk, and another eight-minute run. And that's it! I was intimidated at first by the eight minutes of running, but I found that after four or five minutes, a few more hardly matter. And strangely running only twice felt like less running somehow, even though I did a mile and a half total.

I think I might attribute my energy to the poffertjes I ate for breakfast. Yum.

Also, I have to recommend the book I'm reading right now: Real Food: What to Eat and Why, by Nina Planck. I hope to go into more detail after I finish the book, but I can honestly say it's transforming the way I think about food.

Yesterday's run went better than I expected, considering all my bodily fluids were trying to stage an escape through my nose. I made it all the way through all three five-minute runs. Woo!

week five

I did the first run for week five today. Three five-minute runs, with three-minute walks in-between. It went...okay, I guess. I'm coming down with a cold so I didn't feel awesome. In fact, I decided after the run that I was going to repeat this week. So I'll do the day one run again on Thursday, and the day two run will be Saturday and next Tuesday. So that means I won't have to do the twenty minute (ARGH!) run until next week. Postponing the inevitable? Perhaps. But I think it also might be guaranteeing that I make it through instead of feeling overwhelmed and sucky and just quitting.

week four down...

Week four, a.k.a. week "ouch," is done. This one was really hard. My last run of the week was today, and unlike the past weeks, I didn't feel more comfortable by Saturday. In fact, the run felt just as hard as Thursday's. Maybe a little easier than Tuesday's.

The good news is that my weight was 134.4. Wow! I hadn't expected that! That's a six-pound loss. I think I gained it back tonight with my bleu cheese burger after the football game. Totally worth it, though. I haven't had a burger in more than a month.

The bad news is that I just peeked at the week five plan. Next Saturday, I'm supposed to run for twenty minutes NONSTOP. The only way I would have run twenty minutes in the past was if I were being actively pursued by a ravenous lion. Perhaps I can entice Rufus, the Bobcat mascot, to chase me around the track wielding a steak knife and fork.

Today's run went better, although it still didn't feel fantastic. I did walk briefly during the second five-minute stretch, but only about twenty seconds, and I tagged that amount onto the end to make up for it. I do feel better now than I did on Thursday, probably because I didn't follow up my run with a half-hour walk home in 90 degree heat. Also perhaps because I ate well for lunch. I splurged on a Big Mama's burrito. Yum. I think it gave me extra energy, too.

Week four begins

The title of this post should have a parenthetical title as well. Week four begins (to kick my butt). Here's what I did today: five-minute warm-up walk. Then three minutes of running, ninety seconds of walking. Five minutes of running, two-and-a-half minutes of walking. Three minute run, ninety second walk. Then finish up with another five minute run and cool down.

It was rough. I was tired, and I could feel it. Plus, five minutes of running! Not just once, but twice! I did have to cheat and walk a little in the middle of the second five minutes. I'd like to say I felt great when I was done, but that would be a lie. I felt tired and achy. My side hurt, and my face was tingly and red. And then I had to walk home in the ninety-degree heat!

But I did feel good when I calculated my distance. I'm making about one lap around the track each minute. And a mile on the track is 9.5 laps. So, if I ran about sixteen laps, that's well over a mile and a half of running. Now, my math skills aren't so great, but I think that adds up to AWESOME.

Also felt good when I got on the scale and realize the feasting done this weekend with my in-laws (pizza! Village Bakery! Salaam! DAIRY QUEEN!!!) didn't hurt. Weight: 136.4.

Today's run was hard. But that's mostly my fault. I couldn't rouse myself out of bed this morning, and had to get the run in before we went to the farmer's market with Jeff's parents. So I ran on a stomach empty save for a glass of water. I had no energy. Plus, I ran on the bike path instead of the indoor track at the gym. The ground felt hard and unforgiving, and the sun was bright and hot already at 9:30 a.m.

But I made it through, even if I don't feel great about how it went. Or about having to start a new, harder week on Tuesday. Five minute run!?! I have little confidence in myself. I'll probably end up curled up in an emergency exit doorway along the track, crying like a baby.

Another week three run today. I felt like it went much better. In fact, when I was finishing up the second three-minute segment, I thought for a second "is that it?" Just for a second, though.

I've switched from a Monday-Wednesday-Friday running plan to Tuesday-Thursday-hopefully-Saturday-but-maybe-Sunday schedule. On Mondays and Wednesdays I teach until 1 p.m., so I was quick eating lunch, letting it digest for fifteen minutes, and then hitting the gym. Not a great idea. Tuesdays and Thursdays I finish at noon, and have office hours until 1. It's much better to eat more slowly over my office hour, even stretch it out until 1:30, and then go run.

two down, four to go!

I have these five pairs of pants and one pair of jeans that I just can't wear. I can remember the last time I wore most of them: sometime in the winter when I was pregnant with Charlotte. Because I was so sick my first trimester and lost a lot of weight, it took me a long time to outgrow my regular, non-maternity clothes. I was wearing regular pants in February, when I was five months pregnant.

However, I haven't been able to wear any of those pants since then. Except for last night, when, on a whim, I tried them on. And, whaddya know! Two of the six fit. So I can now reintroduce my army green khakis and my tan cords into the wardrobe mix.

I'm coming your way next, burgundy cords, brown khakis, tan khakis, and bootcut jeans. You can't hide for long.

week three

Today's run wasn't so bad, for being my first encounter with week three. Five minute walking warm-up, then run for ninety seconds, walk for ninety seconds, run for three minutes, walk for three minutes. Repeat.

When I saw the schedule for this week, I thought, "Run for THREE MINUTES?" I wondered when the last time was that I ran for that length of time. Probably gym class. Ugh.

But it went better than I thought. I tried my hardest not to peek at my watch until I was positive a huge amount of time had passed. The first round through I looked at two minutes. Not bad. The second time, I checked at just over a minute. Oops. That time was harder. My face was very red when I was all done today.

Week three weight: 137.8. Down a pound from last week.

Week 2 Done

Today I completed my last run for week two. I'm a little embarrassed to say that this means I've made it farther in the program than I ever did when I started before. I would always make it through the second run in week two, and then something would come up: a weekend away, out-of-town guests, bad weather or poor health...

So next week, week three, is new terrain for me. We'll see how it goes.

Today's run went really well. I felt stronger, and like I had more endurance, than before. I also was also pleased to discover that my enormous dinner from my date with Jeff last night didn't cause any weight gain. Yes, I could not resist the siren song of the scale. I tell myself I will weight only once a week so I don't become number-obsessed (since that's really not what this is about). But I was curious what kind of impact three jumbo sesame shrimp, french bread dipped in olive oil and parmesan, salad with creamy gorgonzola dressing, snap peas and carrots and potatoes and a sirloin steak the size of my daughter's thigh would make. Seriously, that was some meal. And I can't forget the strawberry amaretto cake for dessert. At least we split that. Gluttony! Hey, it was for our anniversary. Cut us some slack.

But after all that I was down almost another half pound from Monday. Weight now: 138.4.

Today's run was hard. Perhaps it was due to the two-day break over the weekend. But I felt like I had weights around my ankles. I kept getting stitches in my side, and my muscles were really, really burning. Ugh. I still felt elated when I was done, though. I'm on week two now, which is alternating 90 seconds of running with two minutes of walking for twenty minutes.

I also felt good when I got on the scale: 138.8. Perhaps a fluke...we'll see.

What am I thinking?

Starting another blog? Am I crazy? (Answer: most likely).

I don't plan on having this blog be long-lived. In fact, I'd feel better if it weren't. I'm just starting this site to help me keep track of my weight and exercise goals. I'm not going to focus on writing anything clever or creative. It's more for me, really, although the fact that I'm blogging it means it's for you, too.

So, I'm starting a bit of a diet (more of an eating plan, really) and some regular, structured exercise (as opposed to my usual disorganized flailing about).

The exercise program is here: The Couch-to-5k Running Plan. I just finished week one, which I'll write about more below.

The diet is not really a diet, as I've said. It's more about trying to eat more healthful foods and to limit my options so that I don't overeat, which tends to be my Achilles heel. Achilles stomach? Anyway. I think it's sort of loosely based on the You On A Diet book, although not having read it I can't really say for sure.

So my breakfast options are: smoothie (made with Stonyfield Farms Lowfat Vanilla Yogurt, banana, orange juice, some frozen berries, a little cinnamon, and a few flax seeds for the Omega-3 fatty acids), yogurt with fruit (usually banana) and lowfat granola, or scrambled egg and cheese in a wrap (which I have with some orange juice). Charlotte's favorite option is the smoothie, which she pronounces so cutely it makes me want to give her the whole thing. "Moooonthy."

For lunch I can have a salad (the salad bar in the Baker Center is fantastic, with lots of toppings, and is also very cheap), pasta salad (I make a big batch of this every week, with turkey, peas, cheese, carrots and ranch dressing), or these Hot Pocket-esque things from Aldi that are really cheap and also lowfat, in either turkey and broccoli or "southwest."

For dinner, my options include another salad, this time with protein of some sort like grilled chicken or a salmon fillet, a baked potato with toppings like broccoli, cheese or ham, or a chicken breast or salmon fillet with a veggie of some sort plus a potato too if I'm extra hungry.

Snacks are fresh fruit, apple slices with peanut butter, baby carrots or other crudite veggies with hummus or ranch dressing, roasted almonds and dried cherries, or string cheese.

I've been eating on this plan for about a week and a half now, and I've discovered a couple of things:

1. This diet includes a lot fewer carbs than I am used to. That's great normally, but on days when I'm running, I think I need to incorporate a little more instant energy into my lunches. Today for lunch I got a salad from Quiznos which was delicious but about as far from healthy as a pizza would have been. It included grilled flatbread. When I ordered the salad, I thought, "Oh, I'll eat one of the little wedges of flatbread and throw the rest away." Ha ha! As if. I ate the whole thing. But! My run went really well. I didn't feel shaky afterward, and had more energy during as well. Thank you, flatbread!

2. I really do feel great when I eat a lot of fruit and veggies as opposed to my normal diet of quick, convenient carbs. There were days when I would eat: a nutrigrain bar, a large coffee with cream and sugar, a bag of pretzels, a diet Pepsi, crackers and a sandwich. Ugh. But all those things are so convenient, and can be purchased from a vending machine in Ellis Hall and often eaten with one hand while reading student papers! However, it's worth it to eat better when I can make it through the mid/late afternoon, when traditionally I would experience a slump in energy, without a headache or a crabby request for a nap.

So, I'm running. Those who know me know that I loathe to run. I am not a natural runner. When I've tried to run before, I generally would set goals for myself, like a mile this week, a mile and half next, etc. And inevitably, I would fail to reach them. Because no matter how regularly I exercised and how faithfully I stuck with my plan, it never got any easier. It would be time to move up to two miles, and I would still struggle mightily to run one. I hated that. Still do, actually.

I was skeptical about this running plan, but I've heard from many others who've tried it--others like me, who are sworn non-runners--and have had success. So I'm giving it a go. Actually, I've given it several goes, over the summer. But each time I'd start the plan it'd be interrupted by something: a trip out of town, a visit from family, my master's essay, etc. I'd make it to week two and then miss a couple days and have to start over. So at the end of July I decided to just postpone starting the plan again until the school year started, when I could integrate it into my schedule.

That's worked quite well. I teach everyday for two hours, and have a couple of office hours everyday as well. On Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays I will go to the gym around 1:30 p.m. and do my run. Then I get to go home. It's perfect.

I'm also assisted by the fact that my friend Kristen also wants to go to the gym at that time on those days. She's also my office-mate, so we walk down to the gym together. She runs on the treadmill while I slog away on the track. It keeps me accountable.

So, week one is done. Weight: 140.8 lbs.